Posted by Hi guys,
I have been absent for a good 2+ months now. That is not the main reason I create this post but more for myself. I have been through (for me, not comparing) some rough shit the past 2 months and it has been hard to talk to anyone in my close vicinity with besides my wife. And even then, some of the stuff I don't want to talk to my wife about for reasons I will explain later. For those who know me on the forums or teamspeak, they know I am a very extraverted guy. Laid back, hates drama, super nerdy (D&D, all the games)... you know, like 90% of this amazing community. I have been here since the beta of GW2. If there was some place I could vent in a safe way without fear of being blasted to bits on the internet, it would be here.
So end of april I got called in the office (IT consultant) to bluntly tell me out of the blue that I was fired. Effective immediately. For me this was a bitter pill to swallow. Not only had we just signed the document to do a whole roof renovation, making 2 extra rooms and redoing all the woodwork, my wife and I were trying to have kids (normal stuff, no anticonception etc...). Being a guy who had always been priviledged when it comes to work and to be honest, never had to look or fight for a job, this was eye-opening. An oddly sobering experience. So I took a week off to get my mind straight since things weren't going to well. My comfort lies in the fact that I know how my financial situation is in all those situations with a baby and renovations. The uncertainty crushed me and my OCD tendencies. So anyway, end of april I started jobhunting and figuring out what I was going to do. That is when my wife started having more and more issues with her stomach.
It was an ongoing thing for about a week and a half. Just sharp pains in the stomach area and lower back. Beginning of May, we rushed to the ER on a saturday evening since the pain was unbearable. They told us they wanted to do some bloodtests before they put her under scanners. Just to make sure that if she was pregnant, nothing would cause harm. So I leave the hospital since the bloodtaking and analysis would take about 2+ hours. Note that we thought it was something benign and that she had a book with her. If I knew this was serious, I would have stayed. 2 hours later I get a call from my wife, with an unsteady voice that she was pregnant but that she needed to stay in the hospital for overnight care just in case. They didn't know what was wrong and gynecologist was available sunday morning. So I rushed a bit stunned to the hospital with all her things like extra clothes, comforted each other and let her sleep there. There was no room for me to sleep. In the morning I got a call from her saying that the Dr examined her. She would need surgery within 2-3 hours. The reason was an out-of-the-womb pregnancy. The cell had nested in her oviducts (transit canal from the ovaries to womb) and needed to be removed before it bursted. When that bursts, she would be in life danger. Luckily she still had some development time but we were there just in time. The cell + tube needed to be removed leaving only 1 tube for normal future pregnancies. Needless to say we were both a bit stunned. So she went into surgery, everything went fine. She was groggy and sleepy for the rest of the afternoon and had pains all around her stomach muscles. I drove her home that night and the rest is history.
From then it was emotional up and down swings from this. We needed to wait at least 3 months before trying for kids again. Which is nothing in essence. It was just a bit overwhelming that in the span of 10 hours or so, we got to know that we were pregnant (huge suprise) and that it needed to be removed + the tube. As I said in the beginning, I held my emotions intact since she was really suffering and I wanted to be there for her. I confided in my best mate but that is about it. My outlets were stuff like The witcher to really lose myself. And D&D to make believe someone else with my best friends.
The worst part was that this whole thing, job loss and pregnancy, was overshadowed by an even bigger shitstorm. A shitstorm so vile and taxing on my wife (and some parts me) that it was just hard to recover from for a while. It involves federal level (vile) crimes. I cannot post any details for legal reasons.
Beyond all this, everything is on the up right now. Most of the stuff has died down. We are nearing the deadline on when we can try having kids again. Summer vacation is slowly setting in. I just finished my second week at my new job. And I finally can casually enjoy a game again. Hopefully I can join you guys on some casual gaming sessions. In the meantime I have been running 2 adventures of D&D. In one of them I took it upon myself to try my hand at writing. Just to focus on something else. For those interested, I created a reddit post with some backstory and the link itself to my blog. I hope to keep updating it to enhance my writing and keep track of the story in our party.
For those sticking untill the end of the post, Thanks. I need to get stuff off my chest. It feels liberating to put it in writing and share it with what I know to be a kickass community.
Hope to see you guys in game!
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